This is How to Forgive…

Once and for all…

Saleama A. Ruvalcaba

In the last post we talked about why it’s important to forgive. In this post we will talk about HOW to forgive.

I can tell you from experience, I spent years and I mean SO many years mad at the world. People would say to me all the time, “Are you mad at the world?”

I did not like the person I would become when I did not forgive. One of the reasons I did not like the person I would become is because I would spend a lot of time talking and rehearsing the anger I felt toward people. (You do it too.)

We all do it, and it does nothing to help us become who God wants us to become. I would spend a lot of time talking to myself and upset about what I should have said to that person to get even with them. I would contemplate contacting them some kind of way to tell them how I feel.

Do you know what happens when we spend more of our time rehearsing anger we feel towards someone? We are spending less time away from God. And guess what? The moment you get over the hurt and anger from one person, someone else will come along and do something to hurt you too. We waste time rehearsing the anger all over again from someone else…and then – the same cycle repeats.

Over…and over…

It never ends because we live in a fallen world. People say and do things all the time to hurt others. Sometimes intentionally and sometimes not. We spend too much time angry not living in freedom when we don’t forgive.

It has taken me a while, but I learned how to forgive people when they hurt me. And I have seen God bless my life – and I have drawn closer to Him.

Here is what I have done to forgive others:

  • I believe when God says He is near to the brokenhearted.

      Psalm 34:18 “The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.”

      When people hurt us God cares. Sometimes we think that when people hurt us God doesn’t care. He cares. He cares about your hurt, and He cares about the person who hurt you. I talk to God all the time and I tell Him I am hurt. It’s prideful when we cannot tell God, our Father, that we are hurting. So, I talk to God all the time and I tell Him when I am hurting.

      You should do the same. When someone has hurt you, tell God you’re hurt. Ask Him to help you feel better. Ask Him every day to help you feel better. He is listening.

      • I believe when God says we must forgive so He will forgive us.

      Matthew 6:14-15 “For if you forgive other people when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. 15 But if you do not forgive others their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins.”

      Believe it or not, even though you’re hurt, you have hurt someone too. We all hurt people – and lot of the times it’s innocent. If you want God to forgive you of your sins, you must forgive other people. And if you have hurt someone you will want them to forgive you.

      I believe God will not answer my prayers if I choose to hold a grudge against others.

      Think about this…

      Do you ever just accept your life the way it is without wondering if there is more God wants to do in your life? Could it be that maybe God isn’t going to do a lot more in your life until you learn what it means to forgive?

      God wants you to forgive. His word says so. You MUST forgive.

      • I pray blessings over those who have hurt me.

      Matthew 5:44 “But I tell you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you,”

      This has been one of hardest things I ever had to do but trust me it works. Every day you must pray blessings over the people who hurt you. You must ask God to bless their lives abundantly. The one thing I had to learn is, when I pray blessings over the people who have hurt me, and when I pray that God bless their lives abundantly, I am praying that their relationship with God grows stronger. Do you know what happens when people are in a strong relationship with Jesus Christ? They begin to look and act like more like Jesus. Isn’t that what you want for them?

      Isn’t that what you want for yourself, a stronger relationship with God and to resemble Jesus Christ in your walk each day?

      Isn’t that what we want in the world, for business owners, government leaders, law enforcement? We spend too much time angry at everyone and the devil loves it. The world we live in today demonstrates how much anger and unforgiveness is inside everyone.

      Do you want to change the world?

      Start by praying blessings today over all the people who have hurt you. Ask God to bring to your memory people you need to forgive. Believe me, He will show you. And you must pray blessings over people who have hurt you every day. The devil will remind you every day what they did to hurt you. The moment he does, start praying blessings over them.

      Almost every day I get upset at something someone did and the moment it happens I start to praise God. I tell myself, they must need prayer, so I begin to pray blessings on them.

      When we pray blessings over our enemies we truly are living in freedom. And God will use us more and more.

      I want to hear from you.

      As you learn to forgive and you are seeing God bless your life and the lives of the people who hurt you, I want to hear what God is doing in your life.  

      ~ Saleama A. Ruvalcaba


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