Lift Him Up!

Author: Saleama A. Ruvalcaba, MATS 

About seven years ago, me and Omar attended a marriage retreat with our church. The speaker posed a question; ‘How often do you seriously pray for your spouse?” He went on to say, “Not a quick prayer before you go to bed; “Oh, Lord, bless my husband or wife, Amen, goodnight.”

I sat there thinking, “Not very much.” We had been married almost ten-years at that time, and we never once engaged in meaningful prayer for each other.”

There are always seasons of life which are more unhappy than others, but with COVID-19 right now, this is a very scary season for many families.

How is your husband handling it?

Are you talking to him about how he feels?

Do you even care about how he feels or do you assume as a man he’s okay?

The Connection Between John the Baptist

When I was in Bible college several years ago, one evening we were having a discussion on John the Baptist. Someone in class brought up how John the Baptist doubted that Jesus Christ was the Messiah.

Luke 7:20 “John the Baptist sent us to you to ask, “Are you the one who was to come, or should we expect someone else?”

I did not take this verse to really mean that John the Baptist doubted Jesus Christ. In Scripture, John the Baptist seems so strong. He knew he was here to prepare the way for Jesus Christ. The thought of him having doubts seemed crazy to me. But after a lengthy discussion in class, I was proven wrong. John the Baptist did doubt. My professor made the final point on this subject to help me see this verse clearly.

He said; “so often we look at those in leadership positions as strong (emotionally) without considering they too can be vulnerable. We forget, even leaders, strong leaders, need support.” My professor making this point opened my eyes to the verse and it helped me consider my husband and his fears as our spiritual leader and provider.

As women and as wives, sometimes we forget about our husbands who need us to pray for them every single day. I have a woman’s devotional book here in my home. It’s an everyday devotional prayer book published by a major book publisher. It has twenty chapters on prayers that women should be praying each day. The book has prayers on fear, overcoming shame, and prayers for their children – just to name a few. However, throughout the entire twenty chapter book, there is not one chapter on prayer for husbands. Since the book has prayer for children I am going to assume the author expected married women to read the book.

Lift Him Up to The Lord

Our husbands are the leaders in our home. Men are considered strong. They provide. They’re tough. But the sad truth is, we sometimes miss the fact that they often do face times of weakness. They need prayers too. How many prayer requests do people send you a day? Well, guess what? Your husband needs your prayers more. The time you give to others in prayer should also be spent lifting your husband up to the Lord every single day.

To be honest, the marriage retreat me and my Omar attended was an eye opener for me, but it wasn’t until I read Stormie Omartain’s book; The Power of a Praying Wife, ;  that’s when it truly opened my eyes. I attended a bridal shower years ago and while everyone gave household items as gifts, I gave the soon to be bride this book! Praying for your husband is vital!

When I truly understood this – I mean really understood how important MY prayers are for my husband; my marriage went from mediocre at best – to great!

I suddenly became more sensitive to Omar and his needs as a man.

Have you ever asked your husband his prayer needs? Can you seriously be vulnerable with him?

Me and Omar began to have a tenderness toward each other we never had before. It became easier to ask Omar for his prayer needs. And I prayed for him.

Galatians 6:2 “Carry each other’s burdens, and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ.”

Every time I ask Omar his prayer needs, he gives me a list of things that are on his mind to pray about.

One day I was home alone for the entire day. Omar and the kids were gone for the day. I knew Omar was burdened with something he was dealing with. I started praying for him. I sent him a text letting him know I was praying this Scripture over him;

Psalm 128: 1-4 “All you who fear God, how blessed you are! How happily you walk on his smooth straight road! You worked hard and deserve all you’ve got coming. Enjoy the blessing! Revel in the goodness! Your wife will bear children as a vine bears grapes, your household will be like a lush vineyard. Your children will be like olive shoots around your table. Stand in awe of God’s Yes. Oh, how he blesses the one who fears God!”

I was home alone by myself all day. I could have spent that time writing, drinking coffee, on social media, simply enjoying my time alone. It meant so much to Omar to know I was home praying for him.

Do you want to have a great marriage?

Your husband needs your prayers.

Especially in the season we are in right now in our nation.

Don’t assume your husband is not feeling any pressure.

Don’t assume he isn’t afraid.

Don’t assume he isn’t facing any type of temptations.

Don’t assume!

Ask him how he feels.

Pray for his needs and let him know you are praying for him.

Be vulnerable – and watch your marriage change before your eyes. After COVID-19 it will be something else. Your husband will always need prayer.

Your husband will always need YOUR prayers.

Your husband needs you, ladies. Lift him up to the Lord.

-Saleama A. Ruvalcaba, MATS